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Wednesday, April 14, 2004

Get high on welfare 

Americans are getting shorter because the government is not doing enough for them, claims a lefty professor, who has analysed historical height data from Europe and America.

"While the average American man was, at 5ft 9in, two inches taller than the average Briton at the time of the American War of Independence in 1775, nowadays the former is about half an inch shorter than the latter."

"From being the tallest in the world for 200 years with the highest per capita income this suddenly stopped," the good professor says about the Shrinking Yanks. "By the 1950s, the welfare state was already well-established in many European countries. It is an achievement that cannot simply be ignored."

"The Dutch, he says, won their anthropometric advantage by creating the world's best pre- and post-natal clinics. Over the same period, America's rich-poor divide has been widening."

State socialism, kiddies, will make you bigger and taller and stronger and healthier, so that when bad people come for you, you will be able to faster raise your hands over your head and then more gracefully bend over.

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