Saturday, June 18, 2005

Awesome foursome to the rescue 

A group of esteemed elder statesmen, including former Malaysian prime minister Mahathir Mohammed, former US Attorney General Ramsey Clark, former Algerian president Ahmed Ben Bella and former French foreign minister Roland Dumas, has recently gotten together to create the Emergency Committee for Iraq.

The aim of the Emergency Committee for Iraq is nothing as pedestrian as, for example, assisting with the reconstruction effort throughout the country, or perhaps coordinating humanitarian assistance for the Iraqi people.

No, the Committee's main objective is to ensure a fair trial for Saddam and Baath Party officials.


In the words of Mahathir Mohammed: "We are interested to see that justice is done, even in the case of Saddam Hussein, because a principle is about to be set here... If it is accepted that the people who launch a war, (and) capture heads of governments can then put this head of government on trial, then other heads of governments will face this danger."

(Mohammed seems to have missed some of the crucial events of the recent past, such as the January election, which means that Saddam (the dictator) is being tried not by the Americans but by the court constituted by the government (democratically elected) of Iraq.)

Yes, God forbid that other heads of government would face this danger. But if you're not convinced, Mahammed offers this chilling warning: "Supposing they decide to invade Syria then (President Bashar Assad) would be caught and accused of mass killings and things like that. Again there will be a trial and he is going to be found guilty even before anything is done."

My God, if Saddam and Assad aren't safe, which other innocent heads of state might be at risk? What about Kim or Castro?

Clearly, now that Amnesty International is busy protecting terror suspects, there is an obvious gap, and a need to step in and protect other scum of the world, a sort of Save the Dictators, or Stop the (Unelected) Heads (of Governments) from Rolling effort. And who better to lead this group than our foursome:

Mahathir Mohammed, for 22 years Prime Minister of Malaysia; better known for his very public outbursts against the global Jewish conspiracy, and for having managed to put away in prison his main political rival Anwar Ibrahim on charges of sodomy.

Ramsey Clark, LBJ's Attorney-General; better known since then for being a part of every disgusting anti-American campaign and supporting every anti-American dictator including Slobodan Milosevic, and attending a human rights conference. In Baghdad. In 1998. Under Saddam.

Ahmed Ben Bella, the first President of independent Algeria between 1963 and 1965 (having banned other political parties); better known for having spent the following twenty-five years under house arrest, ten in exile, and the last fifteen in political irrelevancy.

Roland Dumas, Socialist former foreign minister and later president of France's constitutional court; better known for having been convicted in 2002 for his role in France's biggest post-war corruption scandal.

Clearly, the Save Saddam campaign is in safe hands.


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